Updated: Apr 15, 2021
Let me start by saying that I absolutely love being a mom. I had my first at age 29 and second at 32. Both of my kids are so different and equally amazing. I love watching them grow and develop their own interests and personalities. My daughter is the sweetest with such a strong thirst of knowledge. She is perfectly content sitting and reading books together, or 'reading' the stories on her own. She's been that way since she was little. She's shy but I've watched her get more confident as she gets older and it's so amazing to see.
My son is such a momma's boy and is always giving me the sweetest hugs. He loves cars and anything that makes a lot of noise. He also loves books and every night is a negotiation as to how many books we will read to him.
I am technically a stay at home mom, especially during the pandemic and quarantine. My daughter is in Kindergarten and we've been virtual learning since September. I'm lucky to have help with my son during her at home days so I can help her focus on school, while also doing some of my own work myself. I prep and teach my classes, and also do some accounting work for my family's small business. Any parent who is juggling work, home school and a pandemic, my heart goes out to you. It's been so tough and I know we have it on the easy side since we have family around.
Here is where I start to get real. I'm writing this as my daughter is within earshot on her computer for virtual school. My son is watching Mickey Mouse after he's gone through the 5 different activities I've had planned for him this morning to keep him away from his sister. I would not trade this life or my kids for the WORLD, but this is also HARD. Pandemic parenting is hard. "Normal" parenting is hard.
I'm all for celebrating the positive moments in motherhood. I love posting about their accomplishments or about good days we've had together. But that isn't always reality. I remember in my early stages of motherhood when my daughter and I were first finding our groove and whenever I had a tough day, I felt like I had to keep it inside. No one wants to hear about you complaining about something so many people desire right? It wasn't until I went to a mommy and me workout class and I sat with other mothers after class for coffee. We kept conversations light at first, but then started opening up about our daily struggles with feeding, nursing, sleeping, etc. It felt SO good to vent about the wonderful life that is motherhood.
After this, I felt more comfortable being real and sharing my good days and my bad days. When I had my son, the jump from one to two was chaotic. My son had issues feeding and we had to have his tongue tie lasered and bring him to a chiropractor for his posture. I was trying to take care of a very needy infant while also spending time with my oldest, who was a trooper but also wanted my attention too. While times are definitely easier now (or at least I'm sleeping more) I definitely still have days where I feel like I'm absolutely failing. I yell or get so overwhelmed by the mess of my house that my anxiety is at a level 100. And you know what, we ALL do. Whether some like to admit it or not, parenting and motherhood is not about perfection and only showing the good parts. When I'd have a tough time, I'd talk about it on Instagram, or with my friends. And guess what? There were so many people that also related.
I just want to end this by saying that you are doing an amazing job. Even the 'best' of parents yell and have hard days, weeks, and seasons. It doesn't make you any less grateful if you admit that you need help, or that you just need to vent because your kid has asked for yet another snack and you're about to lose your mind.
I always say this, but I love my kids with every ounce of my being. I cry just thinking about how quickly it's all going by. But I also relate so much to other moms that admit that their kids are driving them bonkers and that they need a break. There is SO MUCH PRESSURE constantly put on us to be the perfect Pinterest mom. And I say SCREW THAT and be yourself. You will find another tribe of moms that feel the same way.
Picture below is my sweet family last summer.